gentlegem.blogspot

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

why do you always jump into conclusion before getting things right.
why can't you trust me more than others.

the cousin whom i dote a lot since young and kept encouraging to study harder for the coming O levels actually becomes the one who made me get misunderstood and scolded badly by my mom.
what a joke.
isn't there a chinese phrase called "hao ren you hao bao"?
if you ask me now, i can tell you YES, i regretted adding him.
say me bad or whatever. its the fact.

today, or rather yesterday was seriously a bad day for me.
problems came one after another.
first i was troubled by some matters.
next, i got hurt by somebody's words.
followed up last, i got misunderstood.

i felt really emotionally exhausted.
if i can have a choice,
i want to lose my memories and start anew, even if i have to start learning ABC all over again at the age of 18.

now i can't even feel down, with his words i read.
so what emotions can i have.
am i supposed to bring a smile everywhere i go, regardless its from the heart or not?

i always wish somebody can assure me warmth and secure together with a tight hug.
cause i feel empty and afraid.
as tight as posssible, even if i could not breathe from there.

your misunderstandings, i chose to keep silence.
for i know if i were to try to explain, things will become worse.
you will raise your voice at me and worse, fail to listen to my explanation.
those brings me little anger but much disappointment.
i only wish for your understanding and trust.
how hard can it be?

please come near me, only if you are bringing me comfort and warmth.

yours truly,
alicia`JYING

Written at
1:21 AM

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