feeling confused these few days...
whenever i feel irritated or unhappy, i will have a mixed feeling inside me.
i don't know if i am wrong to be angry.
i don't know if i am unreasonable to be angry.
i don't know if i should be angry.
never have this kind of feeling before.
feel so "controlled" on my emotions.
i know when i am irritated, i make him frustrated.
i didn't mean it. i really don't.
just now while argueing about which route is the shortest route, i forced a smile even though i was feeling unhappy.
there were even thoughts that maybe if the person he loves isn't me, he will be much happier.
to others, maybe i am always the bad guy.
cause people feels that he is just too nice to me, and i don't appreciate enough.
am i really unappreciative?
i really don't wish that i will be "tested" again.
what am i thinking...
i really don't know.
i just feel really really tired.
at times, i just wish to be alone.
